What does it mean to be mentally well?

Does it mean I can never be sad? Does it mean I can never feel down? Does it mean I can never have negative thoughts? If I feel like not going out but instead spend the night by myself, does that mean I’m mentally unwell?

Finding comfort in nature's embrace. A moment of tranquility.

Life can feel incredibly overwhelming. Many of us put in 40 hours a week, some more, some less. It's not about who's busier; work is just one part of it. And then there are the chores – Oh gosh, there are so many chores.

Washing dishes, doing laundry, vacuuming, cleaning, organising, grocery shopping, cooking, even exercising or going to the gym can sometimes feel like a chore.

And let's not forget about the constant errands we have to run.

“I need to go to the post office.” “There’s an issue with my bank account – I might have to go to the bank.” “My child isn’t feeling well, so we’re already at the doctor’s.” “My dog is unwell – I’ll need to take him to the vet.” “My car needs a new warrant, but I also need new brake pads.” “I think the electricity company made a mistake – I need to call them.”

And the list just goes on and on and on. It's as if there are more and new challenges every single day.

How can I stay mentally well and keep a positive outlook with everything that is constantly going on? Let’s face it, it’s hard. It’s tough to keep the positive vibes up, change the internal narrative from negative to positive, focus on what’s going well, and accept what’s beyond our control. On the flip side, it often seems simpler to drop everything, curl up in bed, and wait for life to finally take a sharp turn.

With all that we constantly juggle, along with the new challenges we confront day in and day out, it's easy to slip into a negative mindset and feel like a victim of our own lives.

"I've made so many mistakes in my life. Maybe I deserve this." "Nothing positive ever comes my way." "I'm trapped in this situation, and there's nothing I can do to change it." "It's all my fault. If only I had handled things differently, maybe this wouldn't have happened." "I'm a complete failure. I can't seem to get anything right." "Why bother trying? It's all bound to end in disappointment anyway." "Nobody truly understands what I'm going through. I'm alone in this."

Allowing our thoughts to dwell in this direction can easily lead to a downward spiral, and before we know it, we're feeling low, sad, miserable, and lethargic from one day to the next.

But can I never feel down or sad when I'm mentally well?

No, you can indeed feel down or sad. That is a sign of good mental health. When you don't get the job or promotion, or when you go through a breakup, or lose someone, it's perfectly normal to feel sad. And that's okay. It's how it's meant to be. When you allow your emotions and feelings to flow through you, process them, then you can eventually move on. Sometimes it might take a while. Sometimes it might only take a day, but it may resurface when you think about it.

It's important to recognise that being mentally unwell means when these feelings persist over a long period. It doesn't necessarily mean you're in a state of depression. There are many factors that contribute to a condition like this, and it can manifest with various signs and symptoms. If you suspect you have depression, it's best to consult a professional and seek the necessary support.

Having negative thoughts is similar to feeling sad. It's completely normal to have them from time to time. However, if they linger for an extended period, they can lead to feelings and conditions like sadness, fear, anxiety, and depression.

So, what can we do? What can we do to stay mentally well?

Awareness is crucial. What feels right? What doesn't? Tuning into your body and respecting your emerging feelings without judgment will help instigate positive lifestyle changes and maintain a positive mindset. Keeping this in mind, it's vital to take care of yourself and engage in self-care practices. These practices could include:

• Regular exercise

• Balanced nutrition

• Sufficient sleep

• Engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation

• Seeking social support

• Practicing mindfulness or meditation

• Setting realistic goals

• Stress management

• Seeking professional help when needed

• Cultivating a positive outlook on life

Let's briefly touch on each of these points.

Regular Exercise: Engaging in physical activity releases endorphins, chemicals in the brain that promote feelings of happiness and reduce stress. Aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate exercise most days of the week. This could be anything from brisk walking, jogging, cycling, dancing, or yoga.

Balanced Nutrition: Eating a diverse, well-balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats provides essential nutrients that support brain function and mood regulation. Minimize the consumption of ultra-processed foods, sugary snacks, and excessive caffeine or alcohol, as they can negatively impact mental wellbeing. Sufficient Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep per night. Sleep is crucial for cognitive function, emotional wellbeing, and overall mental health. Establish a consistent sleep schedule and create a relaxing bedtime routine to improve sleep quality.

Engaging in Joyful Activities: Pursuing hobbies and activities that bring joy, relaxation, and a sense of accomplishment can provide a mental and emotional boost. This could include anything from reading, painting, playing a musical instrument, gardening, or engaging in sports.

Seeking Social Support: While it's normal to prefer a quiet night in sometimes, maintaining strong social connections and relationships provides emotional support and a sense of belonging, which are vital for mental wellbeing. Make time for meaningful interactions with family, friends, or support groups. Share your feelings and concerns openly.

Mindfulness or Meditation:

Practices like mindfulness or meditation help calm the mind, reduce stress, and increase self-awareness. They can also improve focus and emotional regulation. Start with short, regular sessions and gradually increase the duration as you become more comfortable.

Setting Realistic Goals:

Establishing achievable goals, both short-term and long-term, provides a sense of purpose and accomplishment, boosting self-esteem and overall wellbeing. Break larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks to maintain motivation and track progress.

Stress Management Techniques: Deep breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, or journaling can help manage stress and promote a sense of calm and clarity. Practice these techniques when feeling overwhelmed or anxious.

Seeking Professional Help: If struggling with persistent or severe mental distress, consider seeking support from a mental health professional, such as a therapist, counsellor, or psychiatrist. They can provide specialized guidance, therapy, or medication if necessary.

Cultivating a Positive Outlook: Cultivate a positive mindset by focusing on gratitude, positive affirmations, and finding the silver linings in challenging situations. Engage in activities that promote positivity and surround yourself with uplifting influences.

It's important to remember that not all of these practices might work for everyone. Starting slowly but steadily, and establishing healthy habits that can be integrated into your lifestyle is key. Consistency and patience are key in establishing a routine that supports your mental wellbeing.

With Love & Serenity,

Carina 🌺💫